I loved Grandmother dearly. I loved her for what and who she was, including her quick wit and often underlying humor. I loved the schoolmarm that we frequently saw as a personality. It was part of her character. And although her discipline wasn’t fun (whose is?) I loved her that she cared enough to dole it out, and today I look back with a smile at her brand of justice. I loved the juxtaposition of things that made her the woman she was.
Grandmother was a pioneer in many ways. There were two types of schoolteachers in her day. Those who were educated and those who were chosen. Grandmother was educated, and chosen. She taught school in areas such as Coldwater Michigan. I do not know if she continued to teach once her children began to arrive.
She left the “city” behind and married Grandfather. For five years they lived on a farm (on Brookwood). Her husband was often away sheep shearing or instructing and his letters show how difficult this really was. They talk of hardship and lack of money and of trying to send someone to her with medicine for her ailing daughter. Grandmother stuck by her man and her family and made it through the good times and the bad.
She and the family moved fairly often at first, Grandfather was establishing himself in the business world. She attended a ladies sewing school and became quite a good seamstress. In fact she hand made my mother’s wedding gown.
She left the country behind when Grandfather was sent to teach shearing in South Africa for 2 years. Dad spoke fondly of that time in his memoirs.
But I remember Grandmother older, in her home in Ludington Michigan, often dealing with 7 or so rowdy, mischievous grandchildren.
We children ate at a table in the kitchen (for during a meal children were meant to be seen and not heard) the dogs were usually banished to the yard or sometimes the kitchen. Well, of course if we didn’t want certain food it was fed under the table to the dogs. Once Grandmother caught on to that the dogs were definitely banished to the yard, and the perpetrators of the crime received their punishment. That didn’t stop the mischief though….oh no- then there were pats of butter tossed on the ceiling to come down on whoever was washing dishes later. There was a great deal of hilarity in Grandmother’s house. And I believe she knew most of what was happening. She often got an impish look to her eye.
Ah, now, the punishment for which Grandmother was famous was truly a Grandmother classic. If you were a miscreant she would grab you by the ear to pull you close and putting her middle finger against her thumb – THWACK! smack you on the other ear with one finger……wearing a thimble! Believe me it may not sound bad but try it some time and you will see how much of an impression it makes!
When we were at home and it was our birthday we could always count on something that was very important to a child- a card, in the mail! The scented card would have a small check enclosed. Grandmother never missed a birthday.
Grandmother loved baseball and loved to settle down in her chair in the living room to watch the Detroit Tigers. Grandfather was not a Tigers fan, in fact I don’t think he was as interested in sports. I recall him sitting in his chair reading the paper as she watched the game…..and then perhaps disappearing into his workshop.
Grandmother became ill, she had a terminal illness which eventually affected her thinking. She came to live with us for a time in Bellwood, IL outside of Chicago. I recall that once my sister and I were left in charge of her and our charge got away……..we got a phone call from a local beautician telling us she was there and wanted a perm. We laughed in relief and said, well if she made it all the way there then by all means let her have it! (Dad was shocked! He said that our home to the beautician route was exactly the same route – different place obviously- she once traveled in Forest Park to get to her salon!) After that we kept a better eye on her…..and she on me! One afternoon- I believe I was about 13- she took me to the side and asked me who I was. I said, “Grandmother, I’m Dawn! You know, Dawn? Arnold’s daughter?” She drew back and pulled herself up to full height…”Dawn? You aren’t Dawn! Dawn died! Ohhhhhhh.” she stopped and then nodded her head wisely, “You must be the one they adopted to take her place!” Although I knew that her mind was not quite right anymore that answer sent me to my Mother who got a good laugh from it. She asked me why on earth she would adopt when she had 7 children! To this day, when someone in the family has a problem I remember Grandmother and say wisely, “Well you know that must be a family trait. I don’t have those troubles. But of course I was adopted!”
For a time I was assigned to help Grandmother get up in the mornings and to do whatever she needed or wanted. It brought us closer in many ways. I didn’t mind the chore. I loved her. I was sorry to see her so ill that she left us and went to a nursing home, and I was deeply saddened when we lost her. She was quite a lady!
